I met this guy from Holland (two hours away by plane) about two years ago. We always had a huge attraction but that was it. We are both members of the a youth organisation in Europe, so we kept on meeting several times during different events all over Europe. Until we fell in love about 4 months ago.I think that noone has ever loved me that much, i’ve never been treated so much like a princess. I love him to bits, we’re both sure about our feelings.

But we can’t move together yet, we still have to finish our studies and that will take about 3 years (unless we can make it sooner). We are seeing each other once a month, which is more or less ok, even if sometimes I freak out and wonder if we’re gonna make it through -like right now!-. Is it possible to survive it for such a long time? We’re willing to do anything, we really think it’s worth fighting for what we have, it’s the most beautiful thing that i’ve had in my life. I wouldn’t want to lose it

But for the past week and half he hasnt been in contact with me all that much i go on skype..hes not on, i text him, he doesnt text me back. but he will have time to play an online game or 2 and then he will text me back saying hes taking a break from studying. my question is is he just trying to say in his own way i dont want to be with you anymore?…or is he just busy and takes breaks on occasion, and im overreacting? its just that not hearing from him or not getting any feedback is driving me nuts! and to me it seems like he doesnt care for my feeling either. i would deff would like a respond asap cause i dont know what to think. i get mixed messages. my gut teels me hes busy, but my mind tells me hes blowing me off.

When i first got here everything was going really smooth, we called and talked very often, skype every weekend, and a good amount of texting. i bought the means of talking to her so she wasn’t outrageously charged for any of those services. Now i’m a half year year into my overseas deployment and she never calls, writes, texts, or acknowledges that she is even getting my messages through any means.

I talked to her a few weeks ago and told her that i didn’t like not talking to her for extended periods of time and that if she was busy that a text or email would suffice,and she apologized for getting me concerned and that she was just really busy with school and her computer had a virus.

Once again I haven’t heard from her. As much as I love her, I don’t think i should have to put myself through all this stress. Also i’ve been denying it, but it seems to be a sign that she lost interest. So what do you think?

A long distance relationship is one kind of relationship that is quite hard to maintain. Some don’t even believe that it is possible to keep a relationship healthy if you are having to conduct it over huge distances.  In reality, only a few have managed to survive the stress and strains that are involved.

Being in this kind of relationship can be lonesome and frustrating at times.  He’s not there to share your winning moments, can’t be there to visit you when you’re unwell and will not be able to be there in times when you need a hug and comfort.  It’s like being in a relationship with a lover that doesn’t exist.

Which of course some people will joke about as he is unable to attend all your family events and won’t be there to visit with your friends most of the time.

If you really want to achieve something then you really have to work hard to get what you want. This applies to relationships as much as anything else, in fact when you are in a relationship that is being conducted over thousands of miles you will almost certainly have to work harder than others do.

Make a Long Distance Relationship Work

Here is some advice on how to make a long distance relationship work:

Have constant communication. Keep in touch as often as possible. Make a call rather than send an email. Frequent talk can fill up your lacking time together.  If you are discussing all the boring little details of your day it can make your partner feel included.
Always update each other on what’s happening in your daily life, tell the story in a fun and loving way as if he could see and feel the people around him.  Make the conversation lively and avoid statements that would upset or make him worry unnecessarily.

Have some degree of loyalty. Both of you might be easily drawn to temptation especially when you don’t feel the warm embrace of a loved one.  If you really love each other then you have to avoid situations or people that might lead you to infidelity. If you work in a young office, then by all means go out for a drink with them all but be careful not to get drunk when you are surrounded by people who you already have a relationship with.
Many relationships are ruined by workplace affairs, take precautions not to become a statistic.

Take time to see each other. Regardless if he is in the Arctic and you’re in the Pacific, no continent should be a boundary if you truly want to see each other.  File a vacation form with your boss or take a time out from your business.  Yes it will take time and cost money but nothing could ever equate to happiness of finally seeing the one you loved and missed for so long.

Embrace Technology. Skype is a free phone system that allows both voice and video calls, it is free and can be installed on just about any pc or laptop. Even a webcam can cost as little as a pizza, hearing the one you love is great but seeing them as well really does add another dimension to it.

The main secret in how to make a long distance relationship work is effort, if you can not put the effort in to arrange times to call each other or to buy a webcam the you really do not want the relationship to work and you should be honest about that with your partner.